He Needs To Go To Bed

several fail quotes by Matt:
matt: "sweat dreams"
me: "sweat dreams?? I don't want to dream about sweat"


matt:"and QIOET. fuck me"
me: ??
matt: >.< QUIET***


matt: we went to petsmart tonight. AND THEY HAD THE MOST ADORABLE KITTENS EVER
me: yay petsmart!
matt: I WANTED THEM ALL
me: dawwww
matt: I WANTED TO TAKE THEM HOME PUT THEM IN MY ROOM AND GIGGLE. yes i said giggle. u going to blog that?
me: XD yeah
matt: fuck


also related: my roommate natalia, also full of inconceivable fail.
<last winter making dreidels at a hanukkah party> <natalia has a fuzzy pipecleaner> 
random girl: what are you going to do with that?
natalia: STROKE IT >:D
http://usedbongs.com/wp-content/gallery/tools/pipe-cleaner.jpg